by: Brian North photo by: Stephanie Ringleb Photography Have you ever had a time in your life when you just weren’t sure if you were up to the right thing? You know, the thing that accomplishes something good, meaningful, and productive – and you’re happy doing it every day. “That thing.” Have you questioned whether you are doing it or, if you’re not, what “it” is? I seem to always be doing that. Not because I don’t think I’m necessarily up to the wrong thing, but because I always want to do more. I work with a coach, I have my colleagues (whom I trust with the world), my family, and social media. I get a lot of good and critical feedback, but I often wonder if they are the only ones I can seek advice from for this conversation category. Lately, I’ve been asking some of my closest friends, “If I could be doing anything in the world, what do you think I should be doing?” Keep in mind these happen to be my closest male friends, and these tend to be masculine-forward energetically friends. At first response, I’ve gotten a chuckle, a “What do you mean?”, and then some straightforward, no BS responses. I had this conversation with my longest-standing friend two days ago. His response was the following: “As I get older, I realize the value of telling my friends like it is. With that said B, you seem to simplify business and overcomplicate life. All I need (in reference to himself) is food, shelter, and intimacy. If I need more food and shelter, I work (trade time for money) and by way of treating my wife with love and respect, I receive intimacy. Ever since I’ve known you, you are climbing, and climbing, and climbing, always looking for what’s next, always seeking to grow. Don’t stop, and don’t forget to look around at the same time.” It’s all I’ve been thinking about for the last two days. It was confusing, yet I’ve arrived at the truth in it as well. First, identify with the things that make me happy in life like food, shelter, and intimacy, then either sit and rest (be), or identify what feels right in my gut to achieve those three and go (do). A method to simplification of my thoughts. My lesson from this exercise is that asking friends for advice on myself is an eye-opening exercise that created a very deep and thought-provoking connection. The outcome was straightforward truth, that opened my eyes to an upgrade of the possibilities that await. Simplification. Now I have something new to think about, read about, journal about, write about, teach classes about, ugh here we go again, my brain never stops (insert eye roll). Simplification. Stay true to your core philosophy, and rest, or do more of what gets me/you there.